Derpify: The Adventures of Bob: The Overpowered and Unrealistic OC
by Red is the New Blue
Summary: Meet Bob, the hot, cool, sexy, attractive, fingerlickin' good OC Trainer (Totally not Mary Sue) as he sets out across the land searching far and wide for Pokémon that understand the power that's inside. Has he travels to become the best, he'll meet friends and foes, WILL LOVE BLOOM? Rated T because I'm paranoid. Summary sucks STORY IS REALLY FREAKING GOOD.


**Chapter One: The Rise of a Great New Trainer**

* * *

**Me: Hello everyone, meet Bob.**

**Bob: hi**

**Me: Bob is your stereotypical and lame OC**

**Bob: Well geez you don't gotta be RUDE about it.**

**Me: Shut up, Bob you ungrateful and disrespectful twat! I created you!**

**Bob: Oh master, I bow only to you.**

**Me: Good, now do the disclaimer**

**Bob: Red is the New Blue does not own Pokémon becuz if he did Pokémon anime would be better and Advanceshipping would be canon and Ash would catch Mew!**

**Me: ...**

* * *

***Beep* *Beep* *Beep***

A hand flew down on the alarm clock next to the nightstand by a bed. Bob, the overpowered and unrealistic OC, groaned and drew his covers over his head, not wanting to have to wake up.

As the sun peeked through the window and onto the young man's bed, Bob sighed in defeat and opened his eyes. His eyes widened upon seeing the time on his alarm clock.

"Oh no!" Bob exclaimed. "I'm gonna be late!"

Bob threw off the covers to reveal his sexy, muscular, shirtless body. He had blonde hair and blue eyes, pearly white teeth, and the sexiest eyebrows a man could ask for. He was only fourteen but looked as manly as any manly man could manly manage to get manly.

Bob raced down stairs, not bothering to change, and was about to leave when his mother called him.

"Oh, Bob! Has the day finally come?" Bob's beautiful and angelic mother asked. She wrapped her arms around her shirtless son and held him tightly.

"Oh I'm going to miss you sweetie pumpkin," she said with a sigh.

_"Mooooooom,"_ Bob said with his deep sexy voice. "I'm a grown man! I'm too old to be babied like this!"

_ActuallyBobyou'reonlyfourteen._

"Oh, I'll miss you, take good care of yourself, son whom I trust and love with all of my heart."

With that Bob ran out of the house...

... Without a shirt on.

"Yeah! All right!" Bob exclaimed. "I'm gonna get my first starter from Professor Birch!"

Bob lived in the land of Hoenn, the only region that was as hot as he was. He had moved there with his mother when he was five, and had no memory of his _**mysterious**_ father.

_Of course..._

"Oh, wow, there goes Bob, he's soooo hot!" Kate, the prettiest and most popularest girl in Bob's college said.

Yeah that's right, Bob's so smart he goes to college.

"Hi, Kate!" Bob said densely. Bob was perfect in every way with the exception of how he acted with the ladies. When around attractive females (who constantly flock him, I might add) he was shy, but still friendly, and open, and approachable, and lovable, and beautiful.

"Oh! He spoke to me!" Kate said with a blush. "I wish he'd be _**my**_ boyfriend."

But of course, Bob had other things on his mind. He was too busy to think about women. Now he was off to get his Pokémon and set out on a brand new adventure!

All without ever putting a shirt on.

* * *

"Professor Birch! I'm here!" Bob said, not using the door and rather bursting through the wall like the sexy, strong teenager he was.

"Oh Bob, you sexy devil, no homo" Professor Birch said upon seeing Bob's epic enterance. "How many times have I told you to use the door?"

Bob scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Sorry Professor, I guess I don't know my own strength!"

With that the two laughed. "Well it's perfectly fine that you created a giant hole in the wall," Birch said. "Because you're so cool and sexy (no homo) I'll pay for all the expenses to fix it!"

Bob sighed in relief. Being so cool and sexy really paid off sometimes.

"Professor? What's with all the com-" angelic voice could be heard saying. A head of brown hair popped up from around the corner. She had delicate, white skin, two beautiful sapphire orbs, and lips parted slightly in surprise. Her eyes were locked on Bob and his hotness.

Bob stiffened at the sight of the beautiful girl. _Oh darn it,_ he thought. _Why do I always get so nervous around girls?_

But of course, being the incredibly awesome and talented person he was, Bob shook away the nervousness and stepped toward the girl with his hand outstretched. "Sup, babe, my name is-" he flipped his hair super sexy-like. "- Bob."

May blushed as she grasped the boy's hand. _He's such a sexy hunk,_ she thought to herself. _What is this weird feeling I'm feeling..._

"M-m-m-m-m-m-my n-na-a-m-e-e-e-e is May," the girl said shyly and cutely, a blush stained across her face.

"That's a pretty name," Bob said like a dashing white knight on armor. "Just like you..."

May had to turn away, her entire face bright red from Bob's utter hotness and sexy shirtless chest.

"Well Bob, I'm sorry to say, but May here came in and took my last starter Pokémon," Professor Birch said. "Being that you were late."

Bob's shoulders slumped. If there was _**one**_ weakness Bob had, it was that he was always late.

"Despite the contradictory characteristic you have just inherited, I do have just one Pokémon left that I can give you," Birch said with a charming smile. "I didn't want to give it to any _NORMAL_ trainer because it's a bit mischievous, but I'm confident you can handle it just fine because of your sexiness no homo."

Bob's eyes lit up. "R-really Professor? Wow! Thanks! I'll take it!" Bob said excitedly.

Birch laughed and pulled out-wouldn't you know it-a Master Ball. "I'm entrusting this to you, my boy, because I know you are responsible and lovable," Birch said. "I'm sure you'll do well with it!"

Bob took the Pokémon and pressed the button on the Master Ball, releasing a small pink Pokémon.

"Oh wow!" May said with surprise. "It's a... A Mew!"

._.

"Wowwy wow wow! Yeah! You're right!" Bob said in total shockiness. "I can't believe it!"

The Mew looked around the room before her eyes fell on Bob. She squealed in delight and flew over to the shirtless boy, snuggling against him.

"Ah, I see Mew already likes you!" Birch said, clasping his hands together. "I knew I picked the right trainer when I gave it to you!"

Smiling, Bob smiled and turned to May with a smile. "What Pokémon did you get from Birch?" He asked her smiling.

May pulled out her Pokéball and opened it, releasing a small fire type. "Torchic?" The small thing chirped.

"Whoa, you got a Torchic! That's awesome! I'm sooooooooooooo jealous," said the guy with the Mew.

The Torchic hurried over to Bob and nuzzled her head against his leg. "Hey, I think she likes you!" May said.

"Hey, you know, Pokémon reflect the feelings of their trainers," Birch said, watching Torchic show Bob affection.

May blushed madly, but Bob didn't seem to understand, and simply shrugged.

**A/N: SORRY TO INTERRUPT GUYS BUT I COULDN'T HELP IT. BOB UR SO DENSE LOL ROFL HAHA.**

Then Densey McDoodle Dense Dense began to walk out of the lab, being totally sexy while he did it.

"B-Bob, wait!" May exclaimed, hurrying over to the child prodigy. "We should travel together!"

"Yeah kay cool," Bob said excitedly.

So they did AND BEFORE THEY KNEW IT THEY WERE IN PETALBURG CITY.

"Whoa we're in Petalburg City," Bob said.

"Yes, yes we are," May said. "We should find a Pokémon Center and get a room."

"I wanna battle the gym leader here!" Bob said, pumping his fist excitedly.

"Mew mew!" Mew added.

May scratched her head. "Uh, Bob, aren't you going to put Mew in her Pokéball?"

Bob shook his head. "Nah, Mew doesn't like being in her Pokéball," he said.

"Oh," May said.

AND THEN THEY FOUND A POKÉMON CENTER.

"Whoa we're in Pokémon Center," Bob said.

"Yes, yes we are," May said. "We should go to the desk and get a room."

"I wanna battle the gym leader here!" Bob said, pumping his fist excitedly.

"Mew mew!" Mew added.

May scratched her head. "Uh, Bob, I think the author is getting lazy and using copy/paste."

Suddenly dark clouds began to form over May's head...

... Even though they were inside...

"OH! I mean- uh- oh man, the author is so awesome and talented and should bless FanFiction with his 'completely original' ideas," May said quickly, and the cloud faded away.

...

"Yeah, okay," Bob said, going up to the desk where Nurse Joy was.

"O-oh hi," Nurse Joy said, staring at Bob sweaty chest. "C-can I sleep with you-I mean- get you a room?"

"Yeah, that'd be great," Bob said densely.

**A/N: OMG BOB Y U SO DENSE?**

Nurse Joy gave him the key with a blush before turning away. Bob turned to May.

"Pikachu! Come back here!"

Bob turned around just in time to be knocked over by a Pikachu. The mouse had a red cap in his mouth as he ran over Bob and out of the Pokémon Center. Bob quickly got up and chased after the Pikachu like Sonic the Hedgehog and easily caught him.

(Btw guys read my super cool fic _Bob the Hedgehog: The Super Saiyan Jedi Hedgehog_.)

Bob came back inside of the Pokémon Center, all the other trainers whispering about how cool and awesome he was. He came up to the Pikachu's owner, a boy with crazy, her black hair and brown eyes.

"Wow, you caught my Pokémon!" Ash said as he took the Pikachu. "Thank you."

_Hmmmm, strange, I feel some sort of connection to this guy,_ Bob thought.

"My name is Ash!" Ash said, holding up his hand. "Nice to meet you."

Bob smiled and shook his hand. "Nicetomeetyouheyyouwannatravelwithme?"

"YEAH! AWESOME!" Ash said excitedly, not seeming to consider that Bob was a complete stranger.

"May! Ash here is gonna travel with us!" Bob said, calling over to May.

May Smiled And Hurried Over To Them. "Hello, My Name Is May," She Said Sweetly.

"My name is Ash!" The boy said, shaking her hand.

Bob watched them with a smirk. _Hm they are so KAWAII**** together. I should hook them up,_ he thought.

**********_Kawaii_**** means "cute" in Japanese for all the prepz out there who didn't know that.**

Then the three traveled over to the Petalburg Gym.

"Daughter! You came home!" The gym leader, Norman said upon seeing his daughter walking up.

Bob and Ash's were totally completely udderly shockified. "D-daughter!?" Bob said. "May is the daughter of Norman: The Petalburg Gym Leader!?"

DAH DAH _DAAAAHHHH_

"Yep, and who is this sexy young man, Daughter?" The gym leader said, laying his hands on Bob's shoulders.

**May:** This is Bob, The Overpowered and Unrealistic OC.

**Norman:** Daughter, he may be unrealistic but he sure is sexy.

**May:** Daaaaaad ur embarrassing me! D:

**Norman:** Lol xD

**Bob:** Hey I wanna battle you.

**Norman:** Cool :D

**Bob:** MEW, I CHOOSE YOU!

**Ash:** Dang it, Bob, that's my line...

**Norman:** I will have to use my _strongest_ Pokémon against this trainer. Go! Slacking!

**Ash:** Wth when did we even go to the battle field?

**Bob:** MEW USE MEGA SOLAR FLARE HYDRO THUNDER SHADOW HYPER BEAM SLAM

**Mew:** MMMMEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWJFJDDIDFXHDSUSKETKDNEJELDGSKS NAGEJD

And everything was destroyed.

...

...

...

Oh wait never mind...

Because Bob used his **secret powers** to shield everything!

May looked at Bob with complete shock. "Whoa Bob! What was that!?"

Bob looked at his hands with confusion. "I... I don't know..."

"He has the ability to harness aura!" Norman said. "What a surprise!"

Knowing Bob, it really isn't.

"Whooaaaa Bob... I sure wish I could be as cool as you," Ash said.

* * *

**I'd say something but I'm too busy trying not to kill myself.**

**R&R&R&R&R&R&R PLZ IF YOU LOVE ME AND LOVE THE STORY BUT IF YOU HAVE BAD THINGS TO SAY LIKE ****_CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM_**** SHUT THE HELL UP NOBODY LIKES YOU... PREP.**

**Love you all no homo lol**


End file.
